Two things:
1. "Gorak the beaver is the producer of wind. Gorack uses his mighty beaver breath along with the flapping of his powerful beaver tail to create the wind currents that flow over the earth." Best Wikipedia edit page, ever.
2. If you're like most people, you don't have Fox Soccer Channel and didn't get to catch DC United's whupping of CD Olimpia yesterday. Fear not, here's a highlight reel of the goals.